Peanut Butter Jelly Time!

I was shopping today at Target www.target.com , picking up a few items I needed at home. When I came across my favorite shampoo. Pert! Why? Because I love the idea of not having to condition my hair after I shampoo.

I tried doing the conditioning thing as a kid and it never worked out. For one, it doesn't really lather. How do you apply conditioner that doesn't really lather? I mean, shampoo + water and you got real lather. Just go about scrubbing and you know where you are. Conditioner just doesn't do that. So when I found Pert, it meant I can shampoo and not have to worry about conditioning after! And since I kept being yelled at for taking long showers, it cut my wash time down. Being 1 of 6 kids, you find every minute in the shower (or bathroom) is a luxery. Nothing sucks so bad as having a sibling start banging on the door just as you get a nice hot shower going.

I began to think of all the other combination products I love so much. Take sugar on corn flakes. I know, Kellogg's Frosted Flakes has been around for a while... but!!! My mom always bought plain corn flakes and we had to add sugar to them. To find a cereal where you didn't have to add sugar and stir, but it came perfect was awesome!

Then there is the person who decided to manufacture the draw string in garbage bags. I hated having to use those wire bag ties. You wasted so much storage space trying to get the back cinched up enough to use the ties. It was better to just tie the corners together, rather than use the wire ties. They would slip off when you carried the garbage bag anyways. Then you would often end up with dumped garbage to pick up again.

I had Pert in my hand thinking how much a modern consumer I am appreciating all the combination type products when I realized I was full of shit. Sure, there are some consumer products I love that are a combination of 2 older products. Like Clorox bleach and wipes. But to be the completely honest, I despise those types of products. Why? Because it's usually way more expensive to buy. Other times, it's because I hate the product.

I hate tissue paper with lotion. For one, I hate tissue. I am a forceful nose blower. I blow right threw 1 tissue. I have to fold 2 or 3 tissues together when I need a good blow. My main use for tissue is to clean my glasses. Nothing is worse than smearing lotion all over your lenses.

And I hate buying premarinated chicken in the grocery store. It's always double the price of just plain chicken. And I'm really picky with seasoned meats. Hamburgers are much better plain. I hate seasoned hamburgers. For chicken, all you need is a bit of Tony Chachere's. I'm not sure if you guys in Morocco can get it, but it's great for everything! There's almost nothing I won't put it on top of. It's the main seasoning I keep in the cabnet.

Then there's flavored popcorn. At first I thought this was a terrible keen idea. I bought a huge box of this popcorn and it was completely vile. Give me plain popcorn with salt and butter, and I'm happy.

oh! Another combination food product that tasted like shit. Hotdogs with cheese inside. Can I get an "ewwww!!!" Just something wrong about biting into a hotdog and it squirting back at you with this creamy gooey center.

Then there's peanut butter with jelly already mixed. There's sometimes you want lots and lots of peanut butter and little jelly. Sometimes lots of jelly and not so much peanut butter. Then what if you want strawberry instead of grape jelly? And isn't it better to have 1 piece of bread pure peanut butter and the other jelly? It is then perfectly matched when you put them together.

I'm not sure what is next. Loaves of bread with mustard already spread? A pint of milk where half the container is milk and the other Fruit Loops? Just pull a tab and mix, instant breakfast!

Ugh... it's late. Time for bed.

Before I go, let me add. I hate brewed sweet tea! I hate brewed bottle tea in any form. Let me buy the bags and I'll brew it myself. Yuck!

-Mizike-